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476

"The cold winters"

          As the cold weather creeps into our lives, we come upon several problems that might or could give many of us some grief. There are many out there who just don’t have the money that will needed for heating bills this year due to the high price dealt onto us by the gas companies. Of course they are charging more because it is costing them more to get it. Some gas customers go on a budget being billed an amount that is an average of what they think the customer will use that year. Settle up month takes care of what is needed to get up to zero owed. Talking to a few of my friends, I found that they ,like me, seem to be charged a lot more than we think we will use. But not knowing how bad it will be and if we have a very cold winter, then that amount is justified. But if we have a very mild winter then we should be way up on the amount paid in via the budget amount. That is fine for those of us who pinch the penny but a lot of those who could use that money for other things, will have to really depend on help to make it through.
          I have managed a budget ever since we were married and I have been called a penny-pincher as well as other names because I watch what I buy and if I don’t need something, I don’t buy it, thus getting some remarks from others who would like to have me loan or give money to them. I am not selfish, but I worked hard for that money ,and my life and that of my family members will be based upon what will be left after a medical emergency might come about. It is a good idea to have a little more in the bank than not enough. But then it is very hard for many to be able to do that. Most live right near the edge and a large bill owed would take them down. A lot of people on the other hand live life to the fullest, and with both working and with large payments of a home that really is outside what they really need, they are on the path of bankruptcy and will get there fast if an emergency comes about.

          I want to state here that I don’t covet anyone on what they have in the way of resources. If they want ,they can live as high on the hog as they care too, and they can enjoy what they have as well as what they can give to their children. Envy is not part of my everyday life nor is what others are able to do. I live my life one day at a time based on what I can afford and still have something left for the family at my death. You want to leave this life filled with the promise of having something left over for that spouse or that child. You surely don’t want to leave them penniless , so that they would have to pinch the penny as much as you did. That my friend is love for your family and really is just good old common sense.

          Another thing that cold weather might bring about is if we should ever get another blizzard like we did in “78” or “79”, are we prepared for it ? Would there be enough food in the house to bide you over if you can’t get out? Well ,here is where my experience from the days of old would help me. First off, always have at least a couple bags of flour stored away as well as a box of salt. Also some sugar and stock up on bags of beans. It might be a good idea to have a couple of cases of that bottled water stored away too. If you are a meat eater, then take advantage of great buys in ground beef that you can turn into meatballs or patties or even hamburger steaks. Don’t forget to stock up on toilet paper and some soap. Don’t throw away those ragged socks or flannel pajamas. Keep a tube of toothpaste stored away too. These are things that will help you survive another bad storm thus keeping you indoors and not having to leave. The one thing to remember is that you determine how bad a storm will affect you. You are the one who can assure yourself and your family that everything will be ok if and when that need comes about. Don’t forget to ask someone how to make biscuits or bread and how to cook those beans, if you don’t know already. You probably are laughing at that statement but you would be surprised at how many people don’t even know how to boil water without burning it. That is where our folks taught all of us to take care of ourselves and our families whenever it might be needed. Another thanks to Mom and Dad for that.           So it is up to you to determine how your life is and will be . You call the shots but don’t forget to duck at the right time.
  Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

 

A Look At Our Family.
477

In our family, our grandpas both died at an early age in separate traffic mishaps, and most of us never had the chance to know them. One died in an car and an-urban accident, and the other one was killed as he walked along a road near his home. That particular one was sort of one of those sweep under the rug deals where the sheriff in that county closed that case real fast. It was ruled an accident right away without any questions asked. Grandmother Day knew better but she kept it to herself. Now she was a little lady but she was just about the prettiest grandma a kid could have. It was nice when she would come over and spend the day with all of us. She was strong minded but she never tried to force her views onto us. She had pretty white hair and she always wore a house dress. She wasn't a fancy type of lady but I bet in her young days she was a doll.

. Now with Grandmother Sapp, you have a strong lady who could and would take the honey out of a bear's hands if she wanted to. She lived in the state of Washington and she would send us clothing that she made herself. She was quite a seamstress and she could take a flour sack and make the best shirts or blouses that could of been put on a shelf to sell. She would make a trip to see us every once in a while and she came by train. We would go to the train depot and help her bring all those nice gifts that she made for us. And She wasn't short on words as when she was around, she was the elder and we respected her for it. She always talked in a strong voice but with a tender heart. Both of our grandmothers lived to be 94 before God called them Home. So we had some pretty good role models to base our lives on. You might say that our foundation was a strong one able to get us through whatever life had in store for us. There was love from the top to the bottom and respect in between.

And don’t think that we were angels as many times we got caught doing something we shouldn’t be doing, like one time Bob and I were found with some smokes and did we get it from Mom and Dad. I never again thought of putting one of those disgusting things in my mouth. Many times we were caught fighting each other and that was a no-no with Mom as she stopped that right away. After that , if we were going to duke it out, we found a place where we wouldn’t get caught. Bob, known to all his friends as “HappyJack”, was called Home in 1983 and we really did not take the time while both of us were alive to patch up some old wounds. Mom and Dad had to maintain order in the family and giving out punishment was a necessary part of the job so that it wouldn't happen again.

I will leave you with one thought and that is to honor your parents and grandparents, whether they are still alive or they have taken that trip Home . They only happen once in our lives. To remember is to honor them And to them, no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose their love and you always still be priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by who we are. We are special - Don't ever forget it. Count your Blessings, not your problems". Dad and Mom always told me that if you can't do anything about it then don't worry about it. And those who lived in the old days had a lot to be depressed about, but they were too busy to worry about it. What I have found in life is that respect and loyalty combined with family love, will always be the way to live.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day
 
 

Still "One".
478

In three days this writer will have been married to a pretty blue eyed lady named Ramona for 52 years. Now you might say that there are many more out there that have been married longer, and bless them for doing that. It takes a lot of love to keep mates together these days, what with how the money situation is in this country, and it takes a lot of tolerance too. Anyone who says that there haven’t been some rough times in their lives with their mate has either been very fortunate or they live very far away from each other. In our lives we meet a new block in the road or we suffer through some loss in our families that puts a lot of pressure in a marriage. Many times there are things that happen that seems to break down the foundation that their love for each other was based on.

I can still remember the first time I saw her. She stood 5 ft 8 inches, and she had a slim body and pretty brown hair. But the thing that caught my eyes was the blue eyes she had. She was dressed in a sweater with a scarf around the neck and a pretty skirt with bobby sox and shoes. All the way home back to the farm, I couldn’t keep her out of my mind. It was like an angel had come down from the heavens and took my heart. The next weekend when I saw her again, I asked her for a date. That was the night before Easter of 1956 and I never have regretted picking her for my wife and soul mate. We got married a year later on St. Patrick’s Day, and my life with that pretty blue eyed lady has been a good one.

Marriage is a commitment of one  man to one woman and a vow to our Lord that we will be one and we will be that one until death does us part. It is not just a union, but also a togetherness that can not be found any other way. To be able to care for each other with love and respect and to be able to see that love blossom into a child sent by God to love, nurture and to raise and to make that family stronger , is a happening that keeps on giving.

Ramona and I were blessed with 2 daughters in our first three years of our marriage and we would have liked to have had more but her health wouldn’t allow it so we took what we had and we lived a happy life together as a family. During the next 20 years or more, Ramona had so much love to give that she took up child care and we were blessed with some great children to watch while their parents worked at their jobs. Ramona had a great reputation as a second mother to over 25 children, and the parents knew that their child was in good hands. And even though her time was busy taking care of other’s children, she never lost any time giving her own family a lot of love and care. This lady put in a lot of hours taking care of the home, the children, and me, her husband. When I left for work, she was there to kiss me goodbye. When I came home from work, she kissed me hello. The loss of our daughter Patricia still hurts all three of us. But we have learned to cope with it.

She was and still is the spark in my life that keeps me going. I think about her when I am off doing the shopping, or out in the garden or in the workshop. Ramona, in the last few years, has had some bad times with her breathing, and sometimes I get a little scared when she coughs, but that is because I love her and it hurts me to see her not feeling well. She took good care of me when I had all my surgeries and now it is my turn to take care of her. Bless her big loving heart.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

Today’s Uncertainty
479

It is no question that we are in a time of uncertainty, and how we deal with it, has been difficult for many to decide. When you are in what we are today, we start worrying about how we will survive not only in food, but also in a home. Many through the last few years have over extended themselves in credit purchases, large home buying, and living high off the hog so to speak. Credit is good to have access to if you use it wisely. But you can get in over your head before you know it and that is bad. Buying a home with lots of goodies including extra rooms and more space than is needed, has lately been part of the straw that is breaking the camel’s back. Many through the years have been led to believe that buying a large home is the thing to do and now they find that they can’t pay for it. Many were led to the signing table by sellers who really were selling the customer more than they could afford. Tell the buyer what he or she wants to hear and that is that they can afford this home on what they make now. Now we do have some very honest realtors here in our city who really care about how much the buyer can afford and they sell accordingly, and that is good. But the true fact is that there are many out there who don’t really care about the buyers once the papers are signed and that is bad.

We see commercials on television that tells the viewer that they can get a great buy now and get money back and that is bad. Money that the buyer never had suddenly is offered with a new car or truck too is a play on words and that is bad. All in all, our situation of uncertainty in buying has the customers holding back on buying and that is bad. In order to get back on our feet we need to start buying but also using common sense in doing it.

This writer from the very first of our married life has been on a budget and that is 52 years of knowing where all of our money went and how much we can afford when making purchases. Many have referred to me as a penny pincher. They say that I can make Abe holler in pain while holding on to that penny. Many have said that I am cheap and that I don’t have much to brag about. Well, what we have is what we want in life. What we save is for the time like today when there isn’t any money coming in but enough on hand to feel good about tomorrow. I can rest assured that we won’t go hungry, nor will we feel homeless.

That is the part of what is happening today that gets to me the most. People right here in America going hungry and having no place to live. There is no excuse for that when we are sending food overseas and money too that many times do not get in the right hands. If we as one of the most honored countries in this world can feed others we should be able to feed our own first. I believe in sharing of the assets of the rich to the poor, but also we need to open avenues so that those poor people can earn enough so that they can hold their heads high in making a good life available for the families they are head of.

Of course there are exceptions and we all know that. I was in a store checkout one day and the man in front of me had steaks, drinks, chips, and asked for smokes. And he was complaining that he had no money to buy milk for his children. What a waste a person like that is to society? I have always put my family first before spending anything on myself. The kids can’t go hungry and I don’t need to buy for myself. We have a lot of work ahead of us today and tomorrow.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day
 
 

480
Work with him.

Lately, I have been seeing columns and hearing broadcasts by well-known people who say that they want Obama to fail in all the things he is trying to do here in his 4-year stint in office of President of the United States, elected by the American people. I cannot understand how anyone, who professes to be an American, would make a statement like that. Sure there were many who did not vote for him for various reasons, but once he was voted in, anyone who can say he is a proud American, should honor that choice and hope that he does not fail in getting this country back on it’s feet as the honored country where freedom is something we are proud of and our voting for said leader is an example of how free we are.

President Obama is our leader at least for the next four years and we should be proud to be able to see him go right at the problems we face in today’s age of uncertainty. I have read where people that I thought were proud Americans, have from day one of this new President, tried to run him down not only in what he wants to do but also in what he can get done. Folks, we live in a society where the freedoms ,our ancestors put into motion, are slowly being pulled out from under us and we need someone in that top spot to make sure that we prevail in keeping those freedoms. Sure, he is a man of color and he is young in age, but he is an American and he seems to be wise in his mind. And he is our President at least for four years and we should honor him as such and we should do whatever is needed from each of us to help him get things done while in office.

Sure I was skeptical at first but not because of his color or his age. I thought that maybe he is trying too hard too fast. However, as I listen to him speak, I see a man who is trying to get us back on our feet at a cost of his privacy and of his time spent with his family. Sure, there are some things that he says that sort of makes me wonder about his actions, such as pulling troops out of Iraq but sending more troops into Afghanistan. Most who know me will attest to my feelings about our troops and their welfare. I believe that we have too many soldiers all over the world and not enough at home to protect us if and when we need it.

One of my family is in the Armed Forces and he is there for the duration. He is all soldier and he backs up his President as Commander In Chief, and he is one fine person of 46 years old. He is American to the bone and he will do his best at whatever he is told to do.

Therefore, what I propose to those who are trying to drag our elected President to his knees is this. Try to help our President get his job done while he is in office. Then in 4 years if you want, you can vote in a new one. In addition, our representatives in Congress need to stop being party members and be the representative voted in by the people who expect them to work together regardless of party ties, and get this country back on its feet.  If our elected President fails in what he is trying to do, we are all in the hot pot of despair. If those who are elected do not try to make it better, they should pack their bags and leave. And to those who write and speak of failure, I say this. Shame on you for your words of harm to our system of government. Shame on you for trying to take our country down. Take it from a proud American, that we cannot and should not fail. Exercise restraint in your thoughts of hate. Give thought to how it can be for those who follow.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day
 
 

481
Customer satisfaction.

What we need in today’s world of customer, versus sales, is trust in the ones selling the product. Customers, when they enter a place of business, need to be comfortable with the ones who want to sell their product. They also want to know if something they buy has a valid warranty so that they know they will be taken care of in case of a failure of said purchase. In my 17 plus years of selling a product, I put the customer first over any commission I might receive. That was the way I was trained, and the people I sold to still call me to ask a question about what to buy for a project they are working on.

When that customer walks in the door, he is a potential life long customer or he can be a customer you lost. You have to know what you are talking about and you have to be ready to make sure that he or she will come back and ask for you again. It takes honesty, knowledge of the product, and a good warranty to do that. Will you see that customer again? Will he or she ask for someone else because of the way you took care of him or her the last time? These are very important tools of the selling trade and many times, you don’t get a second chance.

So as the sale of a product goes with a handshake and a promise of satisfaction, so does the earnings of said seller. If you do one customer wrong, word of mouth will follow you for a long time, and your position in selling a product could be terminated by upper management. That is the way that business is, in that they can not compete without associates that can be trusted to represent their sales honestly. I am aware of an example of something like this. I will use the word product as a substitute.

 A couple is purchasing 2 complete sets of  a product. The cost was about $700. After about 6 months, it was so painful to try and use them that the buyer contacted the seller and found out that there was no warranty after that amount of time. But when they were purchased, the buyers were told that the only way that there would be a warranty would be if they are bought as a set, which the buyer did. After talking to a higher up at this business, and finally told that for $100.00 more for each product, they would pick them up and fix them to their satisfaction. When delivered back, the driver said that the payment of the $200 had to made before he brought them in. The buyer wanted to check them out first, but couldn’t so he paid the money.

Well, the buyer still has 2 products that are hard to use so he got in touch with the seller again, and this time he was told that the 2 products that he purchased were not intended to be for “every night adult usage” and nothing more could be done by the seller. So the buyer has to buy 2 new ones. That my folks is what today’s market is all about. Get the money and forget what the family did in the old days because that business is being run by a new set of guidelines of non-customer satisfaction. And that folks is a shame. Customers will remember where they are treated fairly and they will go back there to buy more. But word of mouth is a very powerful thing and sellers need to be on the right side of that type of customer satisfaction. I was taught by the best and I gained from it with come back customers. Customers remember and word of mouth travels far.

So to put it all in a nutshell, if a business wants to stay in competition, then you have to have customer satisfaction. It doesn’t take long for that word of mouth to get around. And that can help or hurt you. Satisfaction guaranteed should be the rule of any business. And trust should be expected from both ends.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day
 
 

“Pictures of life”
#482

 As a man of 72 years of age, you might think that I have seen it all but I haven’ yet. I go back many times to when I was growing up in a large family and I feel good at what I received. I was blessed to have a caring mother who took care of our needs all of our young lives until that time when we could contribute our part. I had a father who was a man of strict thinking and he held a firm hand when he had to. Of course, with him working at his job so that his family had a place to live and food in our bellies, we did not see him as much as we saw our mother. That meant that she had to have complete control of her family both as a protector and as a mother.

She was a woman of love who gave her all for all of us. Mom was one of the pioneers of yesterday who grew up with a very strict mother and a father who died early in her life. She was a lady in all sense of the word in that she stood her ground yet showed emotion while doing it. She and our father married at an early age and together they formed a bond of love that she transferred to all of us in the family. She never really had many goodies in her life because for her it was her man and her children who came first.

I can still see her with her apron on standing over a hot cook stove keeping an eye on the beans while her tators were cooking. There was either cornbread or biscuits in the oven and she always had the oleomargarine close by to flavor the food with. She always had chunks of onions for those who liked them, and the coffee pot was brewing all the time. Put a little smile from her and you had a meal good enough for kings. I remember many times while we were getting ready for school, she would be there in front of that hot stove frying bacon or ham, along with fried eggs, sunny side up or scrambled. Always there were her soda biscuits ready to pop some jelly or butter on, and pancakes for those who wanted them. Mom was a great cook because she had a lot of practice and she sent her love with each plateful to her family.

Now I know you are thinking that I am bragging about my mother and you are correct because I am. Mothers are the link between God and the children of the world. Mom was also a lady who enjoyed playing the piano and telling stories to us and our friends and when a neighborhood kid was at the house, she made sure that he or she was safe from any harm. Mom was liked by the families in our area because she watched out for them and she treated all fairly.

Sometimes this old man goes back in time to move the memories forward for others to know about my mother. That is what memories are, a picture of what it was like in the “Days Of Old”. There still are a lot more pictures to look at and you will see more about Mom and about my father who worked hard at his job so that we could be nourished with warmth, food, and a home. I saw Dad in a different light when I grew up. I saw why he was so tired. Yes, I do like to write about my parents, as I am sure that each of you has some great memories of your family. It is not unusual for me to sit back, close my eyes and talk to mom and dad in my mind. And you can catch me going to the cemetery to stand before their markers and say “Thanks Mom and Dad for everything you did”. Dad was called Home in 1979 and Mom was called Home in 1982, and they did their mission well while here. Our family was truly blessed having them.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

483

A Legacy Left.

While at a funeral of a member of our family, a nice couple came up to me and asked if I was the one who wrote columns for The Tribune. I told him yes and he said that he reads all of them and that made me feel good. While talking with him, he said that he never looks for the outside of a person but instead sees the beauty from within. He said he has never seen an ugly person and he can tell about a person just by listening to them talk. Now here was a man about my age with a beautiful wife who was instrumental in me writing this particular column.

There are a lot of people who only see the outside of a person and never have the chance to see what’s inside a person’s heart and soul. I liked this man and woman as soon as they came up to me because I saw two people who really care about others. Sometimes you have to sit down and talk together to find out that you have very similar views. And that’s what I will venture on today. Take your father and mother for example. In them you found love and you found experience of life that prepared you for today and tomorrow and from the heart of mother and fathers comes peace from within. I have known in my space of time many people who left an imprint on my soul. Many of them have gone HOME but what they left as their legacy still leaves a mark in the happenings of today.

Grandpa Harrington who lived past 100 years of age was very sincere in his thoughts that we need to do what is right and never do what was wrong. He was a small man in stature but he had a heart of gold and whenever you talked with him, you came away with good thoughts.Lee Walters was my principal at Willard School and here was a man dedicated to making sure the children of his school were taught with all the resources available. And he was respected by all his teachers and students. Heber Parks was another one of those men who lived after his 100th birthday. I only knew him a little while but he was a man who only spoke with a sincere message to all and that was to make as much out of life as you can and to live a clean life. His son Gene was one of my teachers.

And of course there was Joe Platt who was our basketball coach as well as in other sports. Joe was my health teacher, gym teacher and I wish I had been good enough to play for him. When Mr. Platt talked he wanted you to remember every thing he said. I remember one day when in class, he said to not forget a thing because a test was coming up and the more we remembered, the faster that test would go. And when Joe was in the gym showing his team what he wanted them to do, the players knew that the test was going to be out there on the floor with another team. Many times, the fans could look over at the bench and Joe’s head was down, and he caught some flak from that but you had to understand the man in that he expected those players on the floor to take charge and represent the whole coaching staff on the bench.

All of these fine gentlemen while they were hear on this earth, played a very vital part in leaving a legacy for those who followed them. We have many men and women still living who are doing their part to carry on that legacy. What they do today leaves a legacy for those who follow. I hope that what I do today plays a part of the next generation movement and I hope that you out there do too. Wouldn’t it be nice to know that you left your mark in history? You wonder how you can and that is to live your life with a purpose and with sincerity.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#484
"Responding to critics"

From a recent column of which I had many responses to, and at the age of 72, and that is young compared to many of my readers who are much older and wiser, we live on this wonderful place called earth, and we contribute our thoughts to try to maintain what He has given us. Therefore, I reached out with a call to others to help our President do what might be best for our country and not of just a few. When I say that I want him to succeed in his quest, it was to get this country back on its feet so that you and I can survive on our own.

Many times, we will need a helping hand to stand up straight and then we walk on our own two feet. It isn’t about all the other things that he or others will work toward during those 4 years in office. Right now, it is about getting us back as workers and families to a little like what it was before the ceiling dropped due to unfortunate happenings by lending companies, and our factories. We know how we got there but sometimes we don’t know the way back.

So yes, I do want him to succeed at getting this country back to the way it was when you could go to bed at night feeling good because you were fed, and you had a few dollars to spare. What is wrong with that type of thinking? I am not alone thinking that we need to succeed, nor am I alone in wanting to succeed. Folks, regardless of which party you and I belong to, we need to put our differences aside and move on to what is best for our country as a whole. It does not matter if we voted for him or against him, he was elected to that post and we should honor him as our President.

During the next 4 years, I know there will be many things that he and the Congress will differ on but that will be the usual thing in Washington. But today we need that hand in hand movement walking and working together in order to unblock our paths back to when it gives you and me the opportunity to succeed in our own right. We are Americans and our country did not get to be the place where many want to live, without working toward it. We did it as self-sacrifice by all, so that people can be free and live with thoughts of continuing to make it better for those who will follow us.

Sure, there is going to be a big hill to climb before we can see the sun shining behind it. Sure, the ones coming up will inherit a national dept large enough that it will take most of their lives to get it down. Sure, there are going to be a lot of fat cats still running businesses to the ground. But we need to make some progress now in order that our youngsters and their children have a safe haven to live in. We are all Americans and the water is getting too hot so we need to cool it down. If the things, that our President does, works he will be known as great but if it fails, he will be known as having failed in his quest to pull us out of a hole so large and so deep, because he did not have enough hands on that pull rope. Do we, as a nation of people who have seen many deep holes, that we were able to crawl out of, just sit back and let that big hole fill up with water and drown all that are in it, or do we help him out.? At this time it should not be party against party, it shoulder be shoulder to shoulder.

It is time that we go forward hand in hand to bring stability back in our lives, and maybe we will have to bear down and soften the pain that might come from it. We Americans stand together as one and we will prevail as one.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

#485
Our Mother With Love

We have a day set aside to honor the link between God and us and it is called “Mother’s Day“. That is our way of letting the world know that our mothers are one of the most treasured of all people and we have one day to do it. For this writer in our family it should have been Mother’s Day everyday. She was the one who bonded with each of us for nine months while carrying us in her womb and carrying out all the things that running a family needs.

Our mother was a dark haired brunette with pretty eyes, and she could hear us coming, it seems, from blocks away. She even had a great sense of smell, as it didn’t take her long before she would tell us that we needed a bath. I laugh at that because taking a bath back in the days of old, meant boiling water on the cook stove and then pouring it in a large wash tub, and then catching us and putting us in that tub. The water was never too hot ,nor was it too cold as you might say it was just right.

Mom was also sharp in knowing whether we had our schoolwork done as well as our chores that each of us had. It really amazed me as to how she knew if we were getting into mischief, as if maybe she had eyes behind her head. And how about making the bed? That was one of our chores and it seemed like Mom would sort of give us the eye as we would finish up and then she would say, “you could do better next time“.

Mom was a lady in all sense of the word and all our friends respected her because she seemed like she always had time to fix us up with popcorn balls and some Kool-Aid. And she, many times, took the time to sit at her piano and play her favorite songs and either hum or sing a little too. As far as cooking was concerned, she was the boss in the kitchen and she was always teaching us to cook different meals. She taught us how to make some great coffee and she could bake the best biscuits and some mouth-watering cornbread that could be eaten either with beans or sometimes with some of her homemade syrup or some of her canned jelly. She made her own fried mush, which is something I still do these days. You talk about fried potatoes being good enough to just make a sandwich smothered with the butter she made, that was really good.

Mom liked to use starch a lot in her wash and sometimes she had to really water down the clothes before she ironed them, You didn’t find a wrinkle in those clothes. Mom  would hang the clothes out in all kinds of weather. She always seemed to know when it was going to rain and she washed clothes accordingly. She had a long clothesline and it would be propped up with a long pole to keep the clothes from touching the ground. There was a few times when we would be running through the yard and that pole had not been propped up and you could get clothes- lined very fast.

Mom had her own grapebarber and it always was full of good grapes in season. She had her own chicken yard and she sent us out to get the eggs out of the roost, and there were a few times when we were pecked at. When Mom was going to fix chicken for her family, she would go out either with a hatchet and cut the head off or she would just wring that chicken’s neck until it would come off and you could see that head flopping around for several minutes. Needless to say when she did these things, she always let us watch and I always thought that it was her way of saying that she could wring our necks if we were bad. When Mom was around we were perfect Angels and we were her angels. Bless that wonderful lady called ”Our Mother.”

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#486
“Write what I know about.”

A reader told me  recently that I should write about something I know about, instead of showing the world that I am dumb about how our system works here in America. So until I get a little smarter and I know what I am writing about, I guess that I will bring to you my “Days Of Old” experiences. What is odd is that I do a lot of research about things I don’t know about, and I pass them on to you the reader because I feel that it needs to be said. And there are many readers out there who tell me that I opened up a few eyes and so I will at some times write my thoughts and hope that my critics will know I have gotten a little smarter in my old age and I am still learning one day at a time.

In my young years, I met people like John Miller, Raymond Gilbert, Bob Sargeant, and Tex Scott, who were very good representatives of the people here in Kokomo and all served our city well. I also knew very well a man and woman named Roscoe and Lucille Day who were my parents , and both said many times that if you have something to say, then do it because what you say to the world could benefit many although there will be many who will disagree. John Beamer was probably the best representative we ever had and his knowledge of the law of the land was one that benefited all he represented. I have had school administrators like Lee Walters and Richard Rea, who did a lot for education of our young people and the things they instilled in us, was to go forth with the truth, and you will greatly benefit from the experience.

I have through the years gotten to the point of knowing that if I can’t change it, I don’t worry about it. But I also know that there are times when we have to stay status quo or we change what is wrong to make it right. So yes, I know a lot about how it was in the old days and that will be my primary basis for this column that you read each week. But I think that I do know a lot about the goings on in our political system, and there will be times when I feel that you need to know what I know. There are many very knowledgeable people who live in this area and we do have some very dedicated representatives serving us, but it sure doesn’t hurt to keep a close eye on what they are voting on because the changes they vote on will affect you and me alike and there is my reason for once in a while writing in this column my thoughts about them.

I guess that having 2 grandmothers who lived to the ages of 94, and who lived a life that many today couldn’t do, and were hard working ladies, sort of helped me because of the things they told us about how hard it was to survive back then. To know what I write about, I had to have a source and I guess that they were that source. Also being able to know the people who led this city and state in our government, and getting their knowledge transferred to my memory, I have the best of both worlds so to speak. So my column will never be an attempt to bring someone down nor to belittle anyone. This column has been entrusted to me to write about my memories, about my thoughts of today, and about how I think we can make things better for all and not just a few. As long as I am on this earth and this newspaper gives me the opportunity to do so, I will try to give you the best I have and no more. So as I write, I also learn. As you read my words you can agree or not. Knowledge is a thing that grows within you and we gain from it. Keep reading and I will keep writing.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#487
"BACK WHEN"

I miss those days of old , and I miss my parents and my old childhood friends. Most of them have been called Home, and I won't see them again until God decides that I have been around long enough and I have endured enough pain in my body and my heart. Until that eventful day, this old body and heart will continue to go back in time to those days when Mom and Dad were the ones in charge and life was great with strict rules and love, spread out through the family, was abundant.

As all youngsters do, we got in trouble doing things that we knew were wrong, and Mom and Dad were there to make sure that it never happened again. Like leaving things where someone could trip over them, or like sneaking out to play with our friends even though our chores were not done. Like leaving the ice box door open causing the food to spoil because the ice had melted down. Like breaking a window while playing softball in the garden lot and not letting them know about it. Like going somewhere without cleaning up and putting on clean underwear. And the worst thing you could do was to tell a fib or take something that was not yours. Oh sure, that sounds like what you did too, and probably you were like our family where Mom and Dad were the heads of the house and all of us had to live by the rules they put down.

In those days you learned your lesson quick and to the point. There wasn’t anything called child abuse back then, because they called it training and education . And Mom didn’t wait till Dad came home because she lived by the rule of taking care of business herself and not leave the job for her man who would be pretty tired by the time he got home from work.

We were around Mom the most , and she was like our friend and Mother too. Dad was considered by most of us as the crabby old man who wanted things his way when he was home and that was ok with Mom as she knew we would be little angels when he was home. I am not saying Dad was a mean person because he wasn’t. He had in his young life gone through some rough times and he knew deep down that his children were not going to be disrespectful to anyone. There were times when he had time to play with us but it didn’t take long before he would have to go sit down and rest. It took me a long time to realize that his working job was his main thing for him to do and until the days when I went to work beside him at the mill, I did not realize how tired he really was. I found out in later life that Mom and Dad were really our best friends because they prepared us for the outside world.

Mom’s homemaker duties was to take care of us kids and to be a friend as well as the mother. Mom could entertain you with her stories of old and her piano playing, and friends from two blocks down would be sitting there on the porch listening to her as she told some of the best stories around. Some got to be scary and Mom knew that once it got bedtime she would have to check our rooms and under the bed because her stories sort of got you thinking . Dad used to comment that mom knew how to keep her children’s trust. Those two had a lot of experience and also a lot of love for each other even though it wasn’t said very much. Our time together in those days was mostly at the dinner table and then all of us sitting on the floor in front of the radio listening to our favorite shows. Dad and I liked to listen to the fights and also we were big fans of the Chicago Cubs, which still is our favorite baseball team, other then Mom and Dad.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#488

“WEEDING OUR GARDEN OF LIFE”

We start out in life with the training by our parents, who God entrusted us with and by the teachers in the schools where we begin our education. Mom and Dad will not always be there, but the training they put you through will always be their part of your growing up. In your training in life, your parents, schools and churches taught you about our God and instilled in you that God is good and He forgives. But further education is up to you, as you have to want to learn as you go in life. If you stop learning, then whatever is left in that brain of yours will slowly begin to dissipate and you will one day be that person who should of but didn’t take the training and use it to the fullest.

In today’s world, we have books and movies which attempt to change your training in that they try to discredit everything you been taught. The schools are told that they can’t have prayer for whoever wants it. Our government can’t have prayer when they want if the name of Christ is mentioned. Our public grounds can’t have any thing on it that is part of the religion that has been part of our system since the day that we won our freedom as a country built with and dedicated to all that is good. They talk about separation of church and state and yet there is no mention in the 1st amendment to our constitution with that phrase or those words. And yet, we let the few dominate the many. We allow our courts to strike down those things we were taught and those things we use to better our lives such as the “Ten Commandments”, the Bible, and our freedom to be able to follow the teaching of the churches, in favor of a few who want to follow the path of evolution.

Folks, you have to look at the full picture in order to see the scumbags who lay in wait until that time when all that is right is now gone. I don’t have to tell you that in order to take down our country, you have to start from within because you see it every day. The scum that we have here around us, waiting to crawl from their hiding places, might be right there, waiting to spring upon you with their verbal attacks and their physical domination. Books are written to dispel the Bible and what it tells us. Actors who for years were favorites with us are now feeding out thoughts with the idea that just maybe all that was right is now wrong.

That is the way that they work in that if you are not sure of how Creation started, then your mind is open to other views. Take down the training and the pure belief in God, and there is a step for the scumbags to climb up on. If those who want to change my belief and my way of life don’t like what I am saying, then they can go somewhere else to spoil the work of our Creator. In other words, if you are not happy here in this USA, then go somewhere else. Take your tainted thoughts and try to find another country that might want you as part of their society. Our country was founded and formed with Christian beliefs, so that we all might be free without fear of reprisal and free of the roaches that hide waiting to sneak out and change everything that is good to everything that is bad.

We can look at a basket of apples, take out the spoiled apple and still have a basket of good ones. But if we wait until that spoiled one starts ruining the rest, we could lose the whole basket of apples. That is what we have to do. Take the spoiled fruit, destroy it, and then enjoy what is left. Once again, we believe in the Bible, the Creation by our God, and the American Way. Take it from me folks; we do have the chore of weeding the Garden Of Life, in order to preserve it.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#489
Garden time.

This is the time of year that I like the most, because each year I go out to the lot behind the house to get my garden area fertilized and prepared for the plants that I will grow for the year. Onions are an important part of my garden and I usually put out at least 1500 plants. Not all will survive but most do. You have to give onion plants a lot of sunshine at least 15 hours a day if possible. And you have to keep them weeded out because weeds take up space and they block the sunshine from the onion plant. I eat a lot of onions and I freeze a lot to eat later in the non-growing season.

I also like peppers but not too much of the real hot kind. Bell peppers are a good source of nutrients needed by the body. And they go in salads, or they can be eaten without cooking them. I like peppers in my fried tators, macaroni salad, chili, and potato salad. I also freeze many peppers and in the winter, I take them out of the freezer, and boy are my meals good using them with the onions, in just about any way I want them. Tomatoes take up most of my garden and I plant Roma's, and just about any kind that might grow big in size. During the growing season, I pull the suckers off part of the plants so that they will grow tall before spreading out. It also makes the tomatoes big in size. I planted radishes, carrots, and cucumbers along with some melon plants. This year I decided to straw the whole garden area except for the onions, radishes and carrots. Straw helps keep the moisture near the plants and it also cuts down on the cultivation of the weeds. Each year you move your plants around so that they can get the nutrients from the soil. Planting the same things in the same place each year causes the plants not to grow too well. So each spring I get my notes out and I decide where I am going to plant which crops where. Also having a map of the garden after planting is done gives you a chance to see how certain plants will grow in your garden.

Many people ask me why I put out a big garden each year and each year I think I am going to cut the size down some, but come spring gives me the desire to once again go out and do what I can to grow food to eat, to freeze and to give away. Also as many of my close friends know, being in the garden several hours a day gives me a chance to meditate and be next to God. Many times I find myself talking to HIM and at times I can feel the wind blow a little faster, or I can hear the loud chirping of the birds, and I feel the presence of HIM right there with me. I do a lot of talking while out there and I feel good knowing He hears me.

During the growing season, I might be out there and see a plant that looks like it will die and I sort of talk to it just as I do to the ones that are growing great. I really believe in talking to my plants and so if you walk up to me in the garden and I don’t turn around, it is because something better has my attention.

Seeing me in my garden, you many times will see me lying there and what I am doing is doing my weeding. I plant on my knees, I weed on my knees and many times I have had to crawl the length of the garden before I can find something to pull myself up with. My body is so sore most of the time that bending over or reaching for something is a no-no. But life has been granted to me to do as much with as I can and that I will do. Life is a garden to me blessed by God.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day
 
 

#490
Responsibility

Why is it that there are some people out there out of work, yet to lazy to put out a garden so that there can be food to eat? Why is it that they can have a smoke in their mouth and a pack in the pocket, yet the child has nothing to eat. Why is it that you can stand behind someone in the checkout line while they put steaks, drinks, chips, and those smokes down, and you hear them say that they can’t afford to buy milk for the kids? I asked a lady why she didn’t put out some plants and tend to a garden just so she could feed her kids. She said that with four kids, each having a different father and she unmarried, she did not have time to grow a garden. She also said that if I was so interested with what she did, how about giving her some money to get some burgers down the road. Of course, you know that I don’t feel any grief for someone like that but I do feel for those kids.

I know that we are not a perfect world but you would think that there would be those out there who know that there are ways to not get pregnant, and there are ways to find work if you are not so lazy to work. Why is it that we have to see this happen all over the world and it really does no good to help some because they have gotten used to having you and I give from the heart and hope that they will start trying to help themselves?

As for those fathers who continue to do the deed without being responsible for their actions, my thought to them is “shame on you”. At this time of a lot of good men and women out of work, the impact of more irresponsible behavior is greater than ever and we need to find out how we can get to these women and men and instill in them that you have to be responsible for your actions. There are people out there who now have to figure out how they are going to maintain a new style of living and those hands that were giving out the money are no more. To all of this, this writer has some answers but do those people really care what I think? Do they want to make their lives better or will they continue to play on the hearts of others while they continue on their paths to always want to be on the receiving end of whatever they can get out of us?

I guess that there are some out there who ask why I care about it if it does not hurt me. And I have to wonder myself why I do because it is no skin off my backside whatever they do. I was raised in a large family but for the first years of my life, things really was not that bad because being young, my brothers and I were under the apron strings of our mother and Dad was doing his part to work enough hours so that we were fed good. Really, all my life at home being in a large family, we were fed great, kept warm, had a nice home to live in and great parents. But as life goes on, you at some time in your life, have to start building your own life and with that goes a large amount of responsibility. And the cycle of life starts on a new path of getting married, having children in that order, and being there for those members of your family.

So yes, I do care that there has to be some responsible men and women out there who need to do for themselves instead of always having the hand out to receive some goodies. I am saying to those who want to change that they can but they have to take the first step. Wouldn’t it be nice to go to bed at night and feeling good about what you did? I know you can do it.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#491
Dad's Day

Well, it is Dad’s turn to be honored and this writer will really get with it and tell you that Dad was one of a kind. When we were young, we were little angels when Dad was home, mainly because Mom would tell us to be our good behavior when our father was home, because he would be tired and he deserved the rest. Of course, this always meant to us that Dad would not tolerate the things Mom would. We always thought that our father was about the strictest person on earth and we would not take the chance to find out otherwise.
 Ernie, who was the oldest would some times take Dad to the limit but even he knew when to back off. Bob and I were always fighting each other but not when Dad was there. You might say that we thought our Dad was mean, but he really wasn’t. He just had a hard job at the mill and a dangerous one at that. Mom always told us that there could always be an accident at the mill and Dad might not be able to come home. But each day he would go out the door and enter that same door sometimes after working a double shift. We were always glad to see him come in that door because many times he would stop off at the grocery and pick up some candy bars for us. He never asked for thanks but he knew we loved him and that was enough for him.

 I can remember many times he would go out and the car wouldn’t start and he would get out the bike and peddle that thing all the way to the mill and that was a long ride. One day he was coming home on that bike and as he passed a parked car, the passenger opened his door and Dad ran right into that door. He was hurt, & he walked the bike home, and when he came in the door, he would act as if nothing happened even though he had a bloody nose. Man, he was one tough man and he was our Dad.

There were times when he would play catch with us but he liked to play horseshoes and he was good. You always tried to get on his side when there were four of us playing. I remember when our younger brother was shooting baskets and Dad asked to shoot the ball. He stood at the free throw line and using his bucket shot, he made a lot of them in a row. Only Russell knows how many. Dad was a big Cub fan and he would get mad when they lost but the next game he was sitting out there under a tree listening to another game. When you talk about being a Cub fan, Dad was at the top of the list. He liked Pro Wrestling and he was a big Bruiser fan and he never missed a match except for when he was working.

 There was a time during which he was in the hospital, due to having a hernia operation, and we were there to see him the day before. Mom and I stood there at the bed and Dad motioned to me to lean down, and when I did, he slipped me a note and motioned me to put it away for now. Mom saw this and as soon as we left, she asked what  Dad passed to me and I opened up my hand and opened the note and it said, “Ray, they are going to put me asleep tomorrow but you don’t have to be here.” Mom asked me if I knew what he meant and I said yes I did. He wanted me to be there and I will be there. Mom said that I was right and she felt ok after that. I must say that we were truly blessed with a good father and even though he was a small man, he had a big heart full of love for all of us. We love and miss him a lot. Happy Fathers’ Day to all fathers.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day
 
 

#492
Negative versus the positive

When are we as a united country, going to run our country with united representatives, there to do what is actually good for the country and not so good for those fat cats who have never worked a job other than the one as a man of politics?  Why does one have to tear down the other? When are those representatives going to really look at what we need and not for something that will fill their pockets? Don't they realize that they are supposed to tell us and show us what they will do for us and not tear the reputation of the person they are trying to beat?

It is of my opinion that before a person is allowed to even try to run for office they should be known to the people for the whole year previous. Why should we vote for an unknown? Many times someone we never heard of will pop up and throw his or her hat in the ring and we wonder where did this person come from? That person will start making promises that most know can’t be met and voters think that here is the one who will lead us away from bad and into a ring of good. What about those bills that are left hanging in Congress?

Now we do have those who want to do what is right for us but once they get in there they find a group that is and will be against any thing that the new kid on the block wants to try and do. In my own opinion, we need to tell those who we elect that if they don't get up off the pot and do something for the good of those who they represent; they are on a quick ride back home to sit in the corner for telling a fib. In all of those who ran in this last election, how much did you know about them before they chose to run?

You know more about me and what I stand for than you do about half of those who wanted your vote. I have written about the things that have happened to me that reinforce my belief and I have been close to death twice only to find out that it wasn't time for me and God had other plans for me. I have written about my family of a wife and two children, and of my parents and my brothers and sisters. You know just about everything there is to know about me without me hollering to the world that I want your vote come election time. In addition, to go a little further, I do have several faults, which I need to overcome before I get that call to go Home.

I am very happy in knowing that you read my column each week, and you like it. I love it when I see someone and they say, “great column”.  What more can I ask but that. But I am slowing down some and there are still a lot of my memories that I want to share with you. And there are some friends that I have not seen in fifty years that I want to see. But like Andy Rooney, I just got to be me, and if that isn't good enough, then so be it.

One thing for certain is that the past cannot be changed, and the future is a mystery, but today can be better if you want it to. As for seeking an office, I would keep you advised as to who I am, what I believe in and what you can expect me to do for all of you. The one thing that this old man is trying to say is we live in a free America with the right to choose who we want to represent us in government, so why do we have to do it in a negative way? Lets take a closer look at those new guys and while we are at it, we can tell those who represent us now that we are looking at changing. Think about it and pull the weeds.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#493
Why I remember.

I was asked by my readers to relate some of my memories of the past. So here goes with what I remember of those wonderful days of my childhood. Memories are to me as gold was to Midas. As long as I have my memories, and I have the chance to share them with you, as part of the older generation to the younger generation, I have my gold. For many of you, these memories will bring back thoughts of what you went through in the olden days, and how you as a survivor came through it. For the younger generation, there will be thoughts of how much of it is true and how much is just an old man's version of his life. Believe me folks, I am a survivor from the days of old that has seen a big change between those days and today.

If the youngsters of today would try to find out about how it was to live back then, they might have a better value of what they have today. The older folk are like a history book and learning from them can be a big plus in your lives today. Memories are a history of what each person went through in their early lives, and many times the memory is only in that person's memory bank. Sometimes many of these memories are written in the family bible, or are on pieces of paper, which are laid to the side only to be found years later, by those who are left behind. Upon reading these notes, you wonder why didn't they tell you about this? And so that sort of gets you wondering, just how much you don't know about that person or how hard it was for that loved one to get by.

The best way to know how it was is to ask about it. And you need to know now instead of waiting until we are gone before asking. The history of our government and of famous people has been written for all to read, but the history of those in our personal lives is transmitted to us either by mouth or by some notes scribbled on paper, not knowing if they will ever be read. That is where you as the person of today, can make sure that the history of your family lives on.

Thinking back to my days of old, I remember how there were different kinds of great tasting foods in Kokomo. Of course, in my mind, the best cook in the whole world was my mother. And just about everyone else my age, will say the same about their mothers. And they should because each and everyone of us had mothers who loved us and took us under their wings , nurtured us, sort of spoiled us with their love, and who personally fixed food that they knew was good for us.

How many times have you gone home to see your mom and dad and have gone to the fridge to see if there was some of mom's good cooking there for you to savor? My mother and father have gone Home, but the memories are still with me. I miss those things that we heard directly from them and their mothers.

Both of our Grandmothers lived to the age of 94 and there was a wealth of memories stored in their memory banks, and we heard it first hand when they were around. I wish I knew more about our grandfathers but they went Home early in our lives. To live in a time when coal, wood, and even corncobs were the source of our heating and cooking needs, gives us a better value of our lives today. One day we might have to go back to that system for heat and for cooking. I wonder if today’s youth could accept that. Could be that all of us might have hopes of never doing it. In today’s world we have found a life of leisure that our parents never had. Thank goodness our parents were strong enough to get through it so we might have it easier in our lives. Bless their wonderful hearts.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#494
Not Closet Material.

You know, writing this column each week and getting praise for what I think about various topics, gives me a sense of belonging to the history of mankind. And I get other people’s thoughts about some of those topics. Many will bring up about their lives as a youngster in the days of old, while others will want to learn more about those times. But you know, I just do not understand why anyone would want to put their heritage up on the far back shelf in their closet to let it die until even those who should know about it are gone from this earth.

Many times, I have gone back in thought to those times when I was young and my grandmothers, my dad and mom, and the others who have passed on, were still with us. The trip back seems to open the door for me and others to reclaim that priceless memory of life as it was and how it has changed. I don’t understand why anyone would want to close the door to such fond memories so long ago, nor do I understand why the youngsters of today do not try to take that trip back. Memories of those days, which are my recollection of my family’s life, will never be buried back in that closet. I will talk and write about them as long as I live and then I hope someone in the family will take up where I left off and do the same.

Remembering how it was helps us today to bring a brighter light to how it can be tomorrow. History is a thing that should be talked about and written about so that the youth of today can learn from the youth of yesterday so that there is a youth of tomorrow. As an old man of 72 who lives one day at a time, I want to let the world know that today just didn’t happen and tomorrow will be because of yesterday and today. Where am I going with this so far? What I am saying is that no matter what the past was, it still is the stepping-stone to life, as we know it today. So when you read this column, you should see that I wouldn’t think of hiding anything about my family and my friends from those great times when we were young and happy and love through out the family was abundant.

Grandmother Sapp was a strong-minded woman who made it very clear that life was not too hard that she couldn’t whip it into shape. Grandmother Day was about the same although she was a little easier on life and she took it as it came. Mom and Dad Day took care of all of us like a father and mother should and we benefited from it. Mom and Dad McKee were about the same on my wife’s side of the family and both were great people who took care of their own in times that were not easy to live in. In today’s world, we have seen many of our brothers and sisters called Home, having done their time here on earth and they have children who should find out as much about their parents as possible so that life meant something to them, and times could be better.

So until that day when I get my call Home, I will try to bring you my thoughts and my memories, along with hope that yesterday will not be lost just because of maybe something happened back then that was so bad you want to forget about it. Sure, there are times in everyone’s life that are hard to take but we live through it. We miss those who were here, and we love those that are still here. We take our problems and we try to make them better, and we walk our path of life knowing that we did it about as well as possible and that we are happy about that. Life is a blessing so great that you hang on to it as long as you can. Get on that path and let life flow with hope.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

#495
THERE IS HOPE OUT THERE

It seems everyday we hear of someone who just could not take life anymore and decided to end theirs. Now before we get into that discussion, I have to make this statement. None of us can possibly know how much of a burden another might be carrying and so we cannot fathom how much that load on their shoulders might weigh. But this writer has to say right now that I feel that no burden is that heavy that an end to their lives is the only way out. Now as you know, I am not a doctor, nor am I a minister, but I am a person who could have dropped off the deep end if not for those special people who would not let me get that far down. Those people know whom I am referring to. This writer has endured a loss of a daughter almost 15 years ago to cancer at the age of 34 and that my friends is a heavy burden to carry. But I had family and many good friends who just would not let me get down. I had several at Sears who were there to tell me that I had to go forth and live my life with the memories of the times when Patty was still with us. Bless their hearts for keeping me going until that time when I could get on with my life. There is no closure but there are better days ahead to live

As a believer, killing oneself is a sin and that in itself is the main reason for not doing it. There are things that happen to all of us, that seem to get worse as we get older but that is the time to change over to a new way of dealing with it. . I have learned to live one day at a time, and not take today’s problems into tomorrow. The one thing that I have found out is that most of those who took that way out would not have done the deed if only they had tried to talk with a good friend or someone who has gone through the same thing. Of course, many times a person will noticed a big change in a good friend but do not take the time to find out what might be wrong. Many times, just talking with a minister could be a great step toward putting your life back on track. Sometimes just changing your everyday habits helps, by you doing things that are more pleasing to you. All I can tell those who feel that they are ready to do the evil deed, that they need to do something fast before the burden gets so heavy that they can’t get out of it. I personally have known several men who felt that they had no other recourse and we read their obits in the paper.

Take a walk sometime and look around you. You will find people who have handicaps either from birth or from accidents and the wars. You won’t see them feeling sorry for themselves as they go about their lives, not letting that handicap slowing them down. Take a trip through the children’s hospitals and see those kids smiling because someone is taking the time and knowledge to help them adjust to the days and years ahead.

So this writer wants to let you know that help can be on the way if only you ask for it. A friend is there in case you need them. And God is up there looking through his books and seeing that you still have a lot of time here on earth if you just give Him a chance to work with you. There is only a split second between life and death and that belongs to Him. This writer can tell you that life is not easy but it is the only game in town. I have pain all over my body and many times I gripe about it but I can live with it. I say thanks at bedtime and thanks when I wake up. The ball is in His court. Try to live today for tomorrow.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

#496
My Hometown.

Today, I write about my hometown of Kokomo, Indiana. Kokomo has been a part of my life, since the day I was born, and I really cannot think of ever moving away. What does any other place have for me that I cannot get here? When you look at it from it's location on the map and you sort of visually think about it as a body, and it seems to me that we are in the heart area and that tells me that we are very important to the rest of this country. Think about it, and remember that this is the home of the inventor of the First Horseless Carriage. Kokomo is and was the home for many inventions that have been beneficial to the rest of the country. Kokomo is a quiet type of place, yet has made a lot of noise in the entertainment world, with many of our residents being in motion pictures. Many have excelled in the sports field. Sports rank high here.

I have received e-mails from as far away as Newfoundland to the north and Australia to the south, who has made visits to Kokomo with friends, and they all have praise for the kindness and hospitality of Kokomo, Indiana. We have a great visitor convention center, and we have a great variety of shopping places to find what we need in the way of clothing, furniture, and food. Business is somewhat slow at this time, but then so is the rest of the country. Things will get better, so we just wait it out.

We have teachers here, county wide, who are very good in their choice of vocation. We have had some great people in the Mayors position, who thought of the people first and they took us through some rough times while in office. Anywhere you go, there is someone you know and brotherly love is abundant. We, at one time, were blessed with a steel mill that provided food on the table and a home to live in. The auto industry was and is prominent in Kokomo.

Our police, fire and sheriff's departments are of the finest, and I feel secure with trusting them to protect my family, my property, and me. Oh sure there are problems that arise every so often with parts of each department as to personnel problems, but that happens in all the other places too. We have a big drug problem in our streets, and we need to help those who are trying to curb it.

We have “We Care” who tries to make our Christmas holidays enjoyable. We have “We Care Park” which does a lot toward assisting the program. There are many out there who really care and they show it every year. The Wyant Family, with all their friends, decorates the park with thousands of lights along with other decorations, regardless of the weather. They donate their time and all proceeds go to "We Care". Talk about "Angels" here on earth.

And who else has something as great as the Haynes-Apperson Celebration around the Fourth of July holidays. Old cars taken well cared of by those people who love them. Food cooked by those who love to cook. And people just getting together for some good old Kokomo fun. Great, isn't it? And in other parts of the year, we see people doing for others when they need it. When there is someone sick or going through great medical bills, some group is organized to help. And good workers maintain our cemeteries. The history of this wonderful spot here on earth is known because others who did live here proudly tell others that they are from Kokomo.

I tell you this, my friends; Kokomo is my home now and will be until I leave this earth. My family and all my friends are here and that is all I need in this life. I guess that I am somewhat old fashioned, but then that is who I am. Take care out there and thanks for inviting me in to spend one morning with you each week. And if someone asks, tell them you are proud to be from Kokomo, Indiana.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day

#497
Products of the times ?

Things have changed a lot since I was a little lad. We didn't  seem to have very many diabetics, even though there were a lot of good things to eat like creamy ice cream, all kinds of candy, and you didn't  have the diet drinks you have now.. We had sweets all the time like lots of Mom‘s own syrup made with her own recipe. And her cakes just melted in your mouth. As far as having a headache or pain in our bodies, we used aspirin or Anacin and that took care of it. And for years, babies when they were put to bed were laid on their bellies. Nowadays they say that is wrong so I guess someone who never had a child or even took care of one changed the rules.

These new lids on medicines today are hard to get off and we never wore a helmet when we rode our bike but today that is sort of the rule. We didn't  have to wear seat belts nor did we have to fasten the baby in but I guess maybe today we do need that with all the drivers talking or text -ting on their cell phones. How many times do you see someone riding in the back of a truck? On a hot day, we drank from the garden hose but today if you did that the water would be so hot you would get burned bad. How about when you were out on a date, both of you would share the same drink. Today you could get a bad case of the germs doing that. And back then we drank all kinds of Kool-Aid but today it seems like that is no more. Doctors made house calls and the phone had party lines .

We seem to never tire of playing outdoors but today we sit in front of the TV all day and watch reruns galore. Dad made our scooters for us using some old roller skates and some 2 by 4s and we would ride them all day. Today the kids would laugh us off the street if we made something for them instead of buying it from the store. We fixed our own problems with a screwdriver and hammer and we kept things going There were no video games to play so we thought up our own games by changing the rules some. If you wanted to see your friends you asked Mom if you could. Today, our children have cell phones and they call home to tell mom that they have been over to a friends house for the last couple of hours. Hey, we use to fall and get hurt but we didn’t file any lawsuits because of it. Today if you say the wrong word, someone wants to take you to court.
You could go to a friend’s house, knock on the door and you could walk on in because neighbors were like family.

It seems like all the time we were growing up, there was always either success, or failure and we had responsibility, yet we had a certain degree of freedom in what we wanted to do. Life was good because we knew how to keep the bad out of it. Were we just a lucky generation or can we really give the credit to our parents and grandparents who after working all their lives wanted to instill the same thoughts into the heads of the younger generation. Has time changed from what it was back in the days of old? Are the ones coming up trying to grasp the worth of the things our parents taught us. Will we one day have to go back to living in a time of turmoil, or will we drift forward in a trance waiting for the worst to happen to us? Can we as members of this generation change the way we eat, sleep, work, and play? Well, I can only say this and you can take it to the bank if it is still here. Only you can make it better, and likewise only you can make it worst. We try to improve not tear up our values.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

#498
 

Trying to save;

This week, I am going to go out on the limb and relate my thoughts on ways to live a little cheaper and still maintain a somewhat usual daily existence. We, as Americans, are used to having what we want when we want it. In today’s world we are experiencing a low side of that routine. We start with the food we buy and we need to take a closer look at what is in the food we buy and take the ones cheaper in price. Many of our foods are about the same except for the name on the box. There are times when we in our home have had great meals at maybe a cost of a dollar. The reason for that is that I, being the chief cook and bottle washer, will at times make a large meal at one time and then bag it up in portions and put in the freezer for later on. You would be surprised at what you can do if you only set your mind to it. Fix the meal, eat what you want, and save the leftovers, by freezing them. I can take a potato and clean it up real good, slice them up with the peelings still on, and season them with all kinds of seasoning, and put them with beans out of the freezer, and take the cornbread that I saved maybe a week before, butter them and fry it in the skillet, add some onions to the plate and lordy it is good. You don’t have to live high off the hog to enjoy good food. As far as meats are concerned, that is where you have to be very cautious because you don’t know what is in that meat that is sent here from other countries. If you want good fresh meat, you need to know whom you are buying it off of. Don’t buy something just because it looks good. Know the actual source of it. Ask your meat cutters.

Cutting down on electric and gas use can save you money too. Don’t use the ovens on a very hot day because it will cause your air conditioner to work harder. Cut down on the use of the microwaves because they do use a lot of power. You don’t need lights on in every room in the house. Turn on the ones that will help to light up another area too.

Grow a garden, as it will benefit you greatly. You can eat all you want and you can freeze a lot to be used later on in the year when produce is high in cost. This year I have put in a lot of work in the garden, which really is good for me. I have planted my garden at a low cost for the plants because I buy from sources that I know have good healthy plants. I would venture to say that I might have maybe $80 in cost and I will reap a bountiful result from that planting. I really think that everyone who has a space to spare about 3ft by 20 ft could profit and enjoy that garden. Lettuce, tomatoes, radishes, carrots, cucumbers, and green beans ca give you a full belly at harvest time.

By driving the car, a few less times can be a way to save money if you have a bike. How many times have you driven to a place that would be easy to get to on your bike? And when you do need to drive, map out where you are going and never cross your path twice. I write down where I need to go and I try to go to as many places before coming home. That way I have done all of it in just one trip by car.

People have labeled me as a skinflint and I don’t mind because that means I watch what I spend and that leaves me a source of needed funds when I really need them. I have had a budget almost our entire married life and I can tell just about where all my money has gone through all those years. Maybe cheap but wise.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

499
 

 Are we asked?

It seems to me that government-funded programs polls, and research on topics that are not of any benefit to a large number of us, are not needed. I, in my time, have asked researchers, polltakers and other groups why they are doing research on things that cannot and will not be of a benefit to us as a whole. I have read polls that use a percentage to show the public what a particular product can do for you. And maybe a couple of hundred people are asked. They use this as a percentage showing that more favored one product over another. So lets say 75% said yes.. That gives you a poll that states 75% of all people favor it. That is not true because you cannot truthfully say that all the people who were not polled felt the same way. Some polls are good if enough people are asked and they give an answer. I asked a person on the phone once what will he put down if I don’t give an answer, and he said that it depended on who was taking the poll. In other words, he said that he would count me as one who felt the same way he did. So please folks, don’t put too much stock in what you see in polls.

In past researches there were facts said that coffee is bad for you because of the caffeine in it. For years I stayed off having no more that one coffee a day because of my heart and kidneys . Now, some researches have stated that coffee is good for you as long as you don’t overdo it. In my particular situation, when I get the jerks, shocks, and shakes at 1:30 am at night, I get up, fix me a cup of coffee and go back to bed and sleep like a baby. Doesn’t make much sense does it?

On television, one of those medical ads appear that tells all the good that medicine will do and then they tell you that you could experience this or that by using said product. They state that you need to tell your doctor what medicines you are taking. Hey, the doctor already knows what you are taking because he or she prescribed it for you. The enhancement libido ads really make me mad, as they should never be on the television, because they can be a tool in satisfaction for those engaging in lovemaking. I know of a father who was asked by his son about the amount of time that said product keeps you in limbo. There really is no easy way for me to relate to you the exact language but I am sure that you know where I am going.

What I would like to see is for our researchers to do research on things that really can be curbed or done away with such as the kinds of cancer, and maybe research on the generic drugs that could be on the market if it wasn’t for the sanctions set down by those who only want to see the original medicines. Think about how much money could be saved by those like myself who have to buy the patented medicines, which are very costly especially to those who have to decide whether they continue to eat or take the medicines. In my thoughts, we, in the greatest country in the world, are at the will of the big pharmaceuticals, and if it wasn’t for those places who market generics at a low cost, we would be at a loss of life either medicine wise or food wise.

And we have representatives in Washington who have the best health care around as well as amounts of social security qualifications that are so far ahead of what the public will get. Where is the equality of that? Do a little research on your own and find out what a member of the house and senate is qualified to get just by completing one term in office. You will be surprised and mad.. And they are the ones who decide what is best for the rest of us in the health care fields.

Ray "Uncle Ray" Day

500

Knocking someone is wrong.

You know there are times when you want to disagree with another person but you don’t due to what problem it might cause between you two. Some of my readers have emailed me and asked why I don’t tell my views of what some people say or write. Well, to set straight right off the bat, that is not what this column is about. I write about what I know and heard about the days of old and many times, I will get on my soapbox and give my thoughts on what is going on today that could or would change the way we live and how our freedom is limited to. Right now, I will make this point. If there is something being done that, I personally think would be a bad trip for America I will let my thoughts be known. I will not use my soapbox as a tool to tear someone down. If I think that our leaders are doing ok, you won’t hear much from me. If I see that our leaders are in the shadow of something that will harm us as a country and me as an individual, then yes you will hear from me. Many times when I do that you will not see the person’s name in print because most of my readers will know whom it is just by knowing how I think.

I am a loyal American, who has had and still has family trying to protect the freedoms that we have now from sources who would attempt to change it. I am a man of sincere thoughts about what should be happening in our city, state and federal governments. I will not tear a man down just because he can’t get things done because of the politics in Washington, Indiana, and Kokomo. What I will do is to continue to voice my opinions about how our representatives should be listening to the people who elected them to office. I am a Democrat because we have to designate said affiliation in order to cast my vote. At one time, I was a Republican, but I saw things that turned me off right away. That is not to say that I will vote a straight ticket because there are people running in both parties who would and could do a better job of representing the voters instead of lobby groups and old friends who promise them some goodies if they vote their way. I have always stated that once a person is voted into office, he or she should cease to listen along party lines and start doing the things that the voters want done.

Will I censure someone by name when I see what he or she has done? Will I use my status as a column writer as one to give me the right to run someone down? The answer to both is no because what I write and say is only my opinion and there will be people on both sides who will or won’t agree with me. Most of my readers might ask why I wrote or said something but they do understand where I am coming from. That is why I sometimes get up on my soapbox and bring my thoughts to you as the reader because you read all of my thoughts and just not some.

Writing this column has been a blessing for me because it keeps me in touch with old friends and new ones too. It gets the youngsters to ask questions about how it was in the old days. And it keeps this old man young because memories so precious are being transferred from my mind to yours. In the coming weeks we will visit the past some, we will talk about today, and we will venture our thoughts about how it will be in the future. So get ready folks, because I have many memories to tell about and I want to be able to tell about them in the future. What will happen today will one day be a memory of the past. And knocking somebody is not my game, and you can take that to the bank.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day